A Final Unusual Occurrence
by pingo1387
Summary: The last installment in the trilogy. A most unexpected thing happens at America's after-meeting party... more inside.
1. In Which Drunkeness Occurs

**At last, the final installment in the trilogy! **

**This story is the third tale in the Unusual Occurrence trilogy. If you haven't read the other two stories, please do so before reading this one.**

**Story one: An Unusual Occurrence /s/8008587/1/An-Unusual-Occurence**

**Story two: Another Unusual Occurrence /s/8765555/1/Another-Unusual-Occurrence**

**And now that you've done that, let's begin, shall we?**

**Oh, yeah: same pairings as last two stories, and the One Piece part takes place between Water 7 and Thriller Bark.**

* * *

As soon as the meeting was finished, America slammed his hands down on the table, causing everyone there to look up in surprise. "Hey, everyone!" he called out loudly and cheerfully. "Anyone want to come over to my place for an after-meeting party and sleepover? It'll be totally awesome!"

More than half of the nations immediately stood up and left. America looked hopefully around at the remaining ones, which included South Korea, England, France, Italy, Romano, Spain, Canada, and Japan (who was discreetly packing up).

South Korea jumped up and yelled "Yeah, dude! It'll be totally awesome!" he and America air-fived from across the table.

England sighed as if annoyed. "I suppose so, seeing as I didn't have any plans for tonight."

France winked at England. "Now see what you've done, _angleterre_! Since you're going, I have to go as well!"

England scowled at France, but didn't take back his agreement.

Italy smiled. "Veee… that sounds like fun~!"

Romano groaned. "Great, now _I_ have to go to protect you from the wine bastard's advances."

"Aw, don't be mean to big brother France, _fratello_!"

"I'm going if you're going, Roma!" Spain smiled at him.

Canada spoke up quietly. "Sure, Al, I'll go. I haven't really been out in a while."

"Japan?" America turned towards the last nation, who had finished packing up and was trying to ninja away. He froze at America's voice and turned slowly towards him.

"_H-Hai_, America-_kun_?"

"Pleeeease can you come?" he made puppy-dog eyes at the older nation. Japan tried to avoid them, but couldn't help looking. He softened a bit.

"I… I suppose so…"

"Woo-hoo!" America spun out of his chair and fell over. Picking himself up, he skipped out of the room like a small child, calling behind his shoulder "Party starts in an hour or two! There'll be alcohol for everyone!"

"At least that makes it worth going," muttered England, straightening the papers in front of him.

"Excuse me for asking, but if you didn't think there was a reason worth going in the first place," said Japan, "then why did you agree, England-_san_?"

"…no reason."

* * *

Everyone showed up about two hours later. They came into America's house, where he greeted them and eagerly invited them to the basement. The place had been set up with food and water jugs covering about three entire tables, a mini-fridge (which presumably held the alcohol), and a speaker system with a place to plug in either an MP3 player or a laptop.

For the next couple of hours, the nations milled around, talked, and ate lightly (saving room for dinner). Around six o'clock, America grabbed a phone and took requests for pizza. A half-hour later, the pizza arrived – large pepperoni for America, medium olive and pepper for England and France to share, small dried seaweed for South Korea, large sausage for the Italies and Spain, small cheese for Canada, and small cheese for Japan.

While they ate their pizza, France smiled and said "Oh, do you know what this reminds me of?"

"Hm? What?" America swallowed half a slice. "Hey! Did you have pizza without me?"

"Yes, but that's not the point. Japan, do you remember the sausage pizza?"

"_Hai_. I'm still rather surprised that Luffy-_san_ managed to finish off the entire thing."

"Wait, wait, time out," said England, staring at them. "Are you saying that Luffy ate an entire pizza while in _my body_?"

"_Su-sumimasen_. We would have asked for your permission first, but seeing as how we could not get a hold of you—"

"No, it's all right… incidentally, what kind of pizza was it?"

"It was sausage."

"And he doesn't mean a sausage _topping_," said France, grinning. "We had the cheese replaced with sausage, so the entire pizza ended up being bread, sauce, and sausage."

"You're _joking_!"

"No, I'm afraid that I'm quite serious."

"Wait… what?" Canada tilted his head. "In England's body? What do you mean by that, _papa_?"

France grinned. "Oh, it's really quite funny. Do you know the manga One Piece?"

Canada thought. "Eh… I think I've heard of it… but I don't really know it…"

"Basically, it's about pirates." Japan opened his mouth, about to state how much _more_ One Piece was really about, but France didn't notice and continued talking. "Anyhow, long story short, _angleterre_ here switched bodies (after messing up something with his magic) with a boy named Luffy, who is _from_ that manga. Apparently he was the captain of the ship… he was quite amusing, though he could be irritating at times. He broke _angleterre_'s television to try and free the people inside."

America snickered. "So _that's _why Iggy's T.V. was broken. Not that I don't believe that you guys were playing a joke on me."

"Okay, so…" South Korea swallowed the food in his mouth to speak properly. "Arthur, you switched bodies with a kid from a J-manga?"

"Yes."

"Wow! What was it like over there?"

"Well, it was… different. That manga takes place in a fantasy world, so there were different elements… such as something called a Transponder Snail, which is apparently like a telephone… not only that, but I was almost caught by a Marine official once. I was in a bookstore and he startled me." He frowned. "Come to think of it, I don't think I ever paid for the book… oh, also, Luffy is made of rubber."

"Rubber?" Spain laughed. "So he stretches?"

"Yes."

"Like, every part of his body?" America snickered. "Even his—"

"I assume so," broke in England. "There's something that they have called a 'Devil Fruit'… if you eat one, you get a power, but you can't swim for the rest of your life."

"Hm… I guess I wouldn't mind doing that…" reflected Canada. America grinned.

"Me too, Mattie! Hell, I'd just have to stay away from water!"

"The problem with that in _that_ world was that they are pirates. They're constantly surrounded by water."

"Oh yeah," said America, finishing off his pizza (everyone else was about halfway through their own). "When you guys did that again, that Sanji guy said that their world is made up of pretty much all islands, and one big mountain that cuts the world in half."

"Pardon?" said Japan. "What about Sanji-_san_?"

"Oh, that's right, you weren't there," said England, turning towards him. "Recently, Sealand messed around with my spell books and accidentally switched Sanji and France. They're actually very similar in personality and looks, come to think of it."

"Ah," said France with a satisfied tone. "So _that's_ why no one seemed suspicious when I acted like myself instead of trying to act out someone I didn't know."

"What're they like?" asked Romano, curious despite his efforts to stay indifferent.

"Well," began England, "first off, the captain Luffy is pretty hyper. He's always hungry, and like I said, he's made of rubber, which I imagine comes in handy in a fight. Also, he has a straw hat that he wears all the time, which was a gift from a friend of his."

"That green-haired man… Zoro? Yes, I think his name was Zoro," said France, "he's kind of grumpy. He keeps three swords at his waist for some reason… though I can't imagine why anyone would need three swords. Plus, he's gay."

America snorted into his water.

"What? I can tell these things. Though he seemed… angry, to say the least, when I revealed what I knew. Angry enough to punch me in the face, anyhow."

England laughed. "Serves you right… also, I believe that Zoro is the first mate. Moving on… the navigator, Nami, she's—"

"Nami is a girl who was raised in Cocoyashi Village. When she was young, the Arlong Pirates walked in and declared the island under their control as part of the 'Arlong Empire'. Everyone had to pay a tribute – 100,000 Berries per adult and 50,000 berries per child. Nami's adoptive mother, Bellmere, only had 100,000 Berries left, after using money to make a delicious meal for Nami and Nojiko (Nami's sister). Bellmere used the 100,000 to pay for Nami and Nojiko, sacrificing her life for them. Nami made a deal with the Arlong, the leader of the pirates. The deal was that she would work as a navigator for them, drawing maps and such, and if she managed to collect 100,000,000 Berries, she would pay the money to Arlong and then free her village. For years, she did this, collecting money and stashing it away in her late stepmother's tangerine orchard. And then she met the Strawhat Pirates. Like with others, she originally agreed to join them in order to eventually take their money and add it to her collection. But these pirates were different. She was happy with them. So when she ended up taking the boat and money, they came after her. They found out her past and also that Arlong never intended to keep his promise. So they beat up the pirates, freeing her village. She came with them as their navigator after a three-day celebration. Not too long after all of them entered the Grand Line, they all decided to help deliver the princess of Alabasta back home. Nami was very supportive of the princess Vivi, and even completed the job without the 1,000,000,000 Berries she originally wanted for completing the task. On Skypiea, an island floating in the sky, she learned how to ride a waver, which is a kind of motorbike without wheels on water. She was also very brave while fighting the god Enel. Oh, and she also stole a lot of gold things before leaving. In Enies Lobby, she pick-pocketed a key to save one of her crewmates, and defeated a woman who could make everything around her too slippery to grip. She can have some issues with anger management… but other than that, she's very sweet and pretty…"

A long silence followed this summary. Then England spoke. "How in the seven hells do you know all of that?"

"I looked up information on the young man that I switched with after coming back, as well as the two lovely ladies."

"Just those three?"

"Yes."

"…ooookay." England shrugged. "Moving on… Usopp is the sniper of the group. He tends to run away from battle, but can be very brave. His nose is unusually long, too."

"Sanji is—" France started to say, but England cut him off.

"Just imagine France with shorter hair and a curly eyebrow and you've got Sanji."

Spain laughed. "Japan, did the artist base the character off of our dear friend here?"

"I don't believe so… but perhaps he was based off of a stereotype of Frenchmen. And… the next crewman is Tony Tony Chopper. He is a reindeer, and the ship doctor. Because he ate the Human-Human devil fruit, he has the ability to speak and stand on his hind legs, as well as change to a humanoid form. If you praise him, he'll often say something along the lines of 'Your praise doesn't make me happy', but he'll look very happy and dance while saying so."

England beat France to the next one. "Robin is the seventh crewmember. She's the historian and a pretty damn good fighter. She ate the Bloom-Bloom fruit, and so is able to make limbs sprout from anywhere visible. She has an aura of mystery about her, as well."

"You may not have read this chapter yet, England-_san_, but there is one more crewmember that very recently joined. His name is Franky, and he is a cyborg and a pervert."

"A pervert?"

"Yes – he insists on walking around in nothing but an open aloha shirt and a Speedo."

"…"

America laughed. "Hey, that doesn't sound too bad! And those guys sound real fun, too!" He looked around. "Oh, hey, is everyone done with their pizza?"

The answer was yes. America piled the remaining slices into a box and shoved it in the fridge, taking out the alcohol. He grinned. "Time to get drunk!"

It turned out that by alcohol for everyone, America had chosen country-specific alcohol: sake for Japan, beer for Canada, sweet wine for the Italies, sangria for Spain, champagne for France, ale for England, sujo for South Korea, and whiskey for himself. There was more than enough there, and America soon got out many glasses and a few bottle-openers.

* * *

An hour and a half later, just about everyone had gotten drunk, including Japan and Korea. Although the most of the countries could take their own alcohol well enough, they couldn't take others as well – and everyone there had tried alcohol that was originally for a different nation, like Spain sampling the whiskey, and South Korea tasting the champagne (the bubbles had gone up his nose at first). England was on his feet, swaying and grinning (he'd passed the 'sad and angry' stage of his drunkenness and reached the 'happy and babbling' stage); France, Italy, Romano, and Spain were singing in Latin; Canada and America were running at each other and bumping chests and sometimes their heads; and South Korea and Japan had switched roles (Japan was doing to South Korea what the latter normally did, or tried to do, to him and China). All were laughing happily (including the singing countries).

"A-And you know what, 'murica," England mumbled, shakily pouring himself some whiskey, "I love you, dude, you _hic_ know?"

"Haha, yeah, I love you too, man~!" America was stumbling off from another chest bump.

"No, mate, seri _hic_ ously," he staggered towards America and threw an arm around him. "I _love _you. Like, _love love love _you."

"Ahahaha! Yeah, I love you too!" America threw an arm around England's shoulders and grinned as well.

"Y-You wanna _hic_ snog?"

"If that means kiss, sure~!"

They leaned in towards each other, but before their lips touched, England fell to the ground and started snoring. America looked down at him.

"Uh… k…" he turned back to Canada, who was running at him without warning and tackling him to the ground.

"Ah… e-excuse me, America-_kun_…"America glanced at Japan, who was holding his mouth and stomach. "Where is the…"

"Out the door, first one down the hall on the right," said America shakily, grinning. Japan nodded and rushed out, coming back a minute later looking slightly more sober (apparently he had washed his face as well).

"Pardon me, but I am ready to sleep. May I ask where I can do so?"

America stumbled towards him and pointed at a corner. "Sleepin' bags over there, dude. Pick whatever."

Japan quietly chose the sleeping bag with the Hulk on it and laid himself out to sleep.

About another hour later, everyone had grabbed a sleeping bag and fallen asleep, worn out from being drunk. Italy and Romano shared the sleeping bag with Batman; Spain chose the one with Spiderman; France grabbed the Wonder Woman one, much to South Korea's protests, who ended up getting the Superman one; Canada took the one with Wolverine; and America naturally got the sleeping bag with Captain America on it.

Yes, everything was peaceful… that is, until morning arrived.

* * *

**Mein gott, I think this is the longest chapter I've ever written for a story.**

**And yes, 'ninja' is now a verb.**


	2. In Which the Nations Are Quick Thinkers

England slowly opened his eyes. He stretched, looking around the cabin as he scratched his head—

_Cabin?_

His eyes widened and he looked around a bit more. Sleeping around him in hammocks were a large-forearmed blue-haired man, a blond man with a curly eyebrow, a long-nosed teenager, a small reindeer with a pink hat, and a boy with a scar under one eye, who was just waking up. The boy blinked his eyes open and glanced at him, grinning.

"_Ohayo_, Zoro!"

Well, it didn't take a genius to figure out what had happened. But how? Perhaps Sealand had used the same spell as last time, for fun… if it _was_ the same spell, then it should wear off in a few days.

"Mornin', Luffy," he muttered, trying to stay in character. He sat up and swung his legs around, standing up. "I'm going to go lift some weights. Tell curly-cue there to get breakfast ready – I'm hungry." He walked out the door, placing a hand on his swords.

"Okay!" he heard Luffy call behind him. And then "Oh, Chopper! You're up!"

* * *

Italy sat up, yawned, and stretched. Mm, last night sure had been fun. He looked over to see if Romano was up yet, but saw no one. He checked his other side. Still no one. In fact, when he looked around, he saw that he was in a completely unfamiliar place. It looked like… a girl's bedroom? What was he doing in a girl's bedroom? He tried to calm himself down, seeing that there was another person – a woman with black hair – in a bed across the room.

He also felt something odd. Looking down, Italy stifled a shriek at what he saw.

Breasts. Large breasts. On his chest.

_What's going on? Did I turn into a woman?_

He got up as quietly as possible, as to not wake the woman. Crossing the room, he looked in the mirror in the dresser to see a stranger staring back at him. A girl with short orange hair, large brown-orange eyes, large breasts, and an impossibly skinny waistline stood in the mirror.

_Oh gosh…! I never thought that I'd look like this as a woman! But where am I, anyway?_

Looking down on the dresser, he spotted a photo. Picking it up, he looked at the picture in the frame, which showed a young woman, probably in her late 20s, with two small children next to her. One of the children was a girl with purple hair and a simple dress. The other…

_This looks like what I look like as a woman, only younger! Wait, maybe I'm not me! Maybe I'm in a different person! Like what happened with England, and what France told us about last night! But who am I?_

He heard something and turned around. The woman with black hair was sitting up and looking at him quietly.

"_Ohayo_, Nami-_chan_," she said. "Are you all right?"

'_Nami'? Isn't that the girl that big brother France talked about for a long time? Okay, let's see… he said she was 'sweet'…_

Italy made an attempt at a smile. "Yes, I'm fine…" _What was her name?_ "…Robin! I just thought I saw something on my face, so I wanted to check~!"

"Hm." The woman – Robin – swung her slender legs around the bed, rose, and stretched. Walking towards the exit, she called back "I'm going to get some fresh air. Do you want to come with me?"

"S-Sure!" Italy/Nami followed her out the door.

* * *

France sat up in his hammock to see Luffy talking happily to Chopper, who had apparently just woken up.

_Oi, not again._

"Mornin', Luffy, Chopper," he called down. Luffy looked up and grinned.

"Sanji! You're up! Make food, I'm hungry!"

"At least let me make it to the kitchen first, bottomless pit," he muttered, hopping down. Looking around properly, he saw that he was in a different room from last time…

_A new ship?_

"Hey, show me where the kitchen is, will you? I'm still getting used to this place."

"Sure!" Luffy ran out of the room, France/Sanji following. Behind him, he heard Chopper say "Good morning… um, Franky!"

* * *

Canada sleepily opened his eyes to see someone leaving the room. Leaving the room? Room? Wait, what room was he in?

"Oh, Chopper! You're up!"

_Chopper? Didn't Japan say something about that last night? Oh no… don't tell me…_

He looked down at his hands and his fear was confirmed: Hooves lay were his hands should be.

_Well, nothing I can do about this now. I might as well wait for England to fix whatever he did._

"Hi… Luffy!" he guessed. Luffy grinned.

"Aw, you sound tired, Chopper!"

"Y-Yeah, I didn't get much sleep last night…"

A voice called down from slightly above them. "Mornin', Luffy, Chopper."

Luffy looked up and grinned. "Sanji! You're up! Make food, I'm hungry!"

"At least let me make it to the kitchen first, bottomless pit," he muttered, hopping down. He looked around and added "Hey, show me where the kitchen is, will you? I'm still getting used to this place."

"Sure!"

Sanji and Luffy left the room, leaving Canada/Chopper alone… alone except for a long-nosed man (was this Usopp?) and a large-forearmed man with blue hair and a Hawaiian shirt (this must be the cyborg, Franky)…

…who was starting to get up.

"Good morning… um, Franky!" he greeted. Franky looked around for a minute. He looked at Canada/Chopper. He looked at his hands, then down at his chest and crotch, where the first one was bare and the second one was thankfully covered. He laughed (to himself, it seemed) and said "Oh, I get it."

"Hm?"

"Nothing, nothing." Franky got down from his hammock and walked out the door, calling "I'm gonna take a look around."

"Okay…"

Usopp rose next. He rubbed his eyes and muttered "Oh, has everyone left already? Oh…" his face brightened. "Hi, Chopper! Hey, is breakfast ready?"

"I… I don't think so… eh, Sanji said that he was going to get it ready as soon as he found the kitchen…"

"Hm…" Usopp got up as well and swung Canada/Chopper up on his shoulders. "C'mon, let's go play on the swing with Luffy!"

"Sure…!"

* * *

Japan opened his eyes and assessed the situation immediately. _Unfamiliar feeling. _He looked down. _Breasts. Large ones. How indecent. _He looked around without sitting up. _Nami by the dresser. Black hair on the pillow, seems to be mine. It looks like I am Nico Robin for the time being._

He sat up and called "_Ohayo_, Nami-_chan_. Are you feeling all right?"

Nami jumped and turned towards him. "Yes, I'm fine… Robin! I just thought I saw something on my face, so I wanted to check~!"

"Hm." Japan/Robin swung his/her legs around and stood up, heading for the exit. "I'm going to get some fresh air. Do you want to come with me?"

"S-Sure!"

* * *

America opened his eyes and sat up in a hammock—

_A hammock? Oh, I'm dreaming, aren't I?_

"Good morning… um, Franky!" came a small voice from below. America looked down at the floor to see a reindeer (Or maybe just a regular deer? He always had trouble telling those two apart) standing on its hind legs and looking up at him.

_Wait, 'Franky'?_

He looked down at his hands, which were huge (along with his tattooed forearms). He glanced at his chest, which was bare from his Hawaiian shirt being open, and his crotch, where a Speedo was being worn.

_So I'm dreaming about what France and Iggy and Japan talked about last night?_

He laughed and said "Oh, I get it."

"Hm?" said the reindeer.

"Nothing, nothing." America/Franky got down from the hammock and walked out the door, calling back "I'm gonna take a look around."

"Okay…"

* * *

**Bet you weren't expecting that, were you~?**


	3. In Which the Strawhats Freak Out

**I now have a thing at school that runs 'til about 5 every day. So unless I can sneak onto a computer in the library and post it there, just expect updates after 5 for the next month-ish. Sorry :(**

* * *

Spain sat up slowly in the Spiderman sleeping bag, stretching. Turning towards Italy and Romano, he said sleepily "Good morning, you two—"

The sight of the two was rather unexpected – unexpected in the sense that Italy appeared to be shaking Romano very hard. "Where. The. Hell. Am. I?" He growled, looking much too angry to be himself.

Romano coughed. "I—I don't know what you mean! Veneziano, what the hell are you doing!?"

"_Don't_ play dumb! Where am I, how did I get here, and who are you!?"

Spain stood up and hurried over to the two, prying Italy away from Romano. "Ita!" he scolded. "Don't be mean to your brother!"

Romano looked like he was about to cry. He hid behind Spain, grabbing the latter's shirt.

Meanwhile, France was waking up across the room. He sat up, stretched, and looked around, apparently alarmed. Seeing Spain and the Italies across the room, he yelled "Oi! Who're you guys and where am I? Did someone kidnap me?"

Romano looked at France now, still frightened. "N-Now the wine bastard's caught whatever Veneziano has!"

"Aah!" Spain shrieked. "You think they're sick!?"

"They must be! Aaah!"

"Aaaah!"

"AAAAH!"

The yelling appeared to wake up Japan, who rose quietly. Looking around, he stood up and strode to France, who was the closest at the time. Coolly looking him in the face, he said quietly and coldly "You have exactly three seconds to tell me where I am, who you are, and how I got here before I _snap your neck_."

France stood up casually and held up a hand. "Now, now, calm yourself. I don't know where we are, and I don't know who _you_ are, so we seem to be in the same situation. Maybe we can figure this out if we just talk things over—"

"Goooood morning, everyone!" yelled an annoying and obnoxious voice from across the room. America sat up in his sleeping bag and shouted "It's a SUPER day to be—hey, where am I?" He looked over to where Spain and Romano were shielding themselves from Italy. "Who're you guys? Hey, wait a minute! You kidnapped me, didn't you!?"

"It seems that almost none of us know how any of us got here…" said Japan, slowly advancing towards Spain and Romano. "Except for these two, that is. Would you two care to _explain_?"

South Korea chose that moment to get up. He rubbed his eyes and blinked. "Huh? What's with the shouting?"

"K-Korea!" called Spain. "You know who we are, right? And you know where you are?"

"Yeah, of course. Why wouldn't I?"

"Oh, thank God!" yelled Romano. "Then you can help shield us from everyone else, all of whom appears to have GONE COMPLETELY INSANE!"

Canada sat up at this point, rubbing his eyes. "Mm… guys, let me sleep a little more, okay?" He paused and looked down at his hands. He blinked, shook his head and looked again. "W… What? I turned into a human?" he whispered. "What happened?"

Japan had reached Spain, Romano, and Korea, the last of whom had joined the other two. Crossing his arms, he said "You all have ten seconds. After that, consider your lives forfeit.

"Ten—"

The last of the sleepers, who had been face-down on the floor, finally awoke. Sitting up, he grumbled "Will everyone _shut up_? I'm trying to sleep over here!"

The nations turned towards him. In one voice (excluding America) the ones who were acting strangely said:

"_Arthur_?"

"Huh?" England looked around, raising an eyebrow. "Who are you guys? What's going on?"

"Arthur! It's you!" Italy exclaimed. Romano, Spain, and Korea shared a three-way confused glance.

"Arthur? I'm not Arthur!"

"W-Who are you, then?" said Canada.

"Roronoa Zoro. And who might you be?"

…

"Wait, _what_!?"

"Hm?"

* * *

"Okay, let me get this straight."

Everyone was sitting in a circle on the floor, looking around slightly confusedly.

"So _you_," continued Spain, pointing to Italy, "you are Nami, correct?"

"Yes, that's right," growled Nami/Italy. She was rather annoyed at being in the body of a man.

"And you're Zoro?"

Zoro/England nodded in confirmation.

"…Sanji?"

Sanji/France nodded.

"Um… Chopper?"

"Y-Yes!" said Chopper/Canada quickly and nervously.

"Robin?"

"_Hai_. I apologize for the earlier threats."

"It's okay… and you're, um, Franky, right?"

"Yow! Of course!" Franky/America tried to put his forearms together, but since they were of regular size, he only succeeded in touching the back of his wrists. He frowned and put them back down.

"Wow," muttered Korea, leaning back. "This is so weird."

"You're telling _me_," moaned Sanji/France in frustration. "I know that you two" (here he gestured to Nami/Italy and Robin/Japan) "are my lovely flowers, but it's so hard to comprehend this while you have the bodies of men!"

"What, so you only love me for my body?" Nami crossed her/his arms and smirked, knowing that she had trapped him.

Sanji/France's mouth dropped open. "I—I—but—"

"She asked you a question, Sanji," said Robin/Japan, sharing a secret smile with Nami/Italy. "Are you going to answer it?"

"Oh, come on; don't put him into a place like that!" Romano grumbled.

The girls (in men's bodies) turned to glare at him. He shrank back under their looks and whispered "Good god, Veneziano can be scary…"

"So this has happened to you all before?" Franky/America scratched his head.

"Yes," said Robin/Japan, turning away from Sanji/France. "Luffy, our captain, switched bodies with Arthur here." She nodded towards Zoro/England.

"That's right, they were telling us about that last night!" Spain exclaimed. "But they also mentioned that it happened again with… well, with France and Sanji." He motioned towards Sanji/France. "It looks like that particular one happened again."

"Ah!" Sanji smirked. "You see, I _wasn't_ making things up."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, curly chef. No one cares," muttered Zoro/England. Sanji/France stood up and strode over to him.

"You wanna fight, shit swordsman?"

"No. I don't have any swords."

"Oh, are you saying that you're useless without your swords?"

"Hah!?" Zoro/England stood up and glared at the cook. "What was that?"

"That's what I thought! You just depend on those things entirely, don't you!?"

"Why, you—!" He drew back a fist and punched Sanji/France in the gut. The latter stumbled, but came back and kicked Zoro/England in the shin. They would have continued if not for Nami/Italy's shouting.

"Sanji-_kun_, please stop fighting. We're going to figure out what to do about this."

"_Hai_, Nami-_swan_!" Sanji/France twirled, then looked at Nami/Italy and yelled out in frustration. He went back to where he was sitting and glared at Zoro/England across the room.

"So," said Franky, "we're all here, right?"

"I think we're all here except for Luffy and Usopp," said Chopper/Canada, looking down. He kept rubbing the top of his head, as he was used to wearing a hat.

"Ha! Good luck to them, then, dealing with everyone who got switched with you lot," said Romano.

"Oh, I just thought of something…" Nami/Italy turned towards Sanji/France. "Since you were telling the truth about being switched with this person, _where did you get the pictures_?"

"I told you, I don't know! I was given to them by America!"

"America?"

"Yes," the cook gestured towards Franky/America. "This young man here."

"Hey, not _me_!" Franky protested. "I wasn't even around then! He means—"

"I think we know what he means, Franky," said Chopper/Canada quietly.

"Oh. Okay then."

"I don't suppose that you three would know where he got the images?" said Robin/Japan, turning towards the three not-switched nations.

South Korea quickly shook his head. "Nope. Nu-uh. He probably got them in his country, and we're not very familiar with the place, so we couldn't tell you."

Romano and Spain looked at him, but kept quiet. They realized that he was hiding the existence of the internet from them, but they weren't sure why.

"Back to the most important issue, now…" Zoro/England crossed his arms. "How did we all get switched, and how do you plan to switch us back?"

"The thing is…" Spain coughed. "It's usually England – Arthur – who's responsible for these things. We usually just wait for him to fix it, so he'll probably do that in your world."

"Ah, right," muttered Sanji/France. "He did that strange spell… and his body (with Luffy) came through the floor so that they could switch back. And the second time…"

"Yeah, yeah, no one cares about you. So we just wait for him to do something?" Zoro/England ignored the look that Sanji/France was giving him.

"Well, pretty much."

"Great. Anything we can do until then?"

"Hm… I'm sure we'll think of something…"

* * *

**In case anyone gets confused, please refer back to this:**

**Zoro = England**

**Nami = Italy**

**Sanji = France**

**Chopper = Canada**

**Robin = Japan**

**Franky = America**

**South Korea, Romano, Spain, Usopp, and Luffy have not switched with anyone.**


	4. In Which Usopp Grows Suspicious

The mixed-up crew of the Strawhats lounged on the deck of the Sunny – Italy/Nami and Japan/Robin were sitting on deck chairs (the latter of the two was reading); America/Franky was walking around the ship, looking at various things; Canada/Chopper, Luffy, and Usopp were playing on the swing; France/Sanji was starting to walk towards the men/ladies; and England/Zoro was swinging weights around the deck, marveling at the strength in that body.

"Good morning, Nami-_san_, Robin-_chan_!" France/Sanji exclaimed, spinning towards them. "Ah, my morning is made just that much better simply by gazing upon the beauty of you two lovely ladies!"

"_Ohayo_, Sanji," said Japan/Robin.

"Morning, Sanji!" exclaimed Italy/Nami.

France/Sanji stopped spinning in front of Italy/Nami. "Darling Nami, would you allow me a passionate morning kiss~?" he puckered his lips expectantly.

_Okay, big brother France said she was really sweet, right?_

"Of course I will, Sanji!" Italy/Nami stood up and, on slight tiptoe, threw his/her arms around him, kissing him full on the lips. France/Sanji's visible eye widened and he was at a loss for words – not that he could speak with the man/lady's lips on his own. The rest of the crew noticed what was going on: Luffy started laughing, Usopp's mouth dropped open, Japan/Robin raised his/her eyebrows, England/Zoro's expression matched Usopp's, Canada/Chopper looked on curiously, and America/Franky whistled and clapped his huge hands.

Italy/Nami eventually broke off the kiss and smiled at France/Sanji. "So are you going to get breakfast ready now, Sanji? I'm getting hungry~!"

France/Sanji's face exploded in a smile that went from ear to ear. "Of _course_, darling, dear Nami-_san_!" He spun towards the kitchen, smiling the whole time. Everyone went back to their activities.

"Well, Nami-_chan_," said Japan/Robin as Italy/Nami sat down again, "what in the world has gotten into you today?"

"Mm? What do you mean, Robin?"

"You're not normally so… affectionate."

"Oh, do you think I kissed him for too long?"

"…I… you know what, forget it. I'm going to try and finish this book."

"Okay~!" Italy/Nami reclined on the deck chair, enjoying the good weather.

"Um…" said Canada/Chopper as he was pushed on the swing, "why'd everyone react like that when Nami kissed Sanji?"

Usopp gave the little reindeer a quizzical look. "Um, because she _never_ does that?"

"Oh, yeah! I-I was just joking! Haha… ha…"

Usopp shrugged and went back to pushing him. "Hey, Chopper! How far can you jump?"

"Jump, Chopper, jump!" Luffy yelled. Canada/Chopper looked nervous.

"W-What?" he squeaked. "Jump? Off of the swing?"

"Yeah! We'll have another contest!" Usopp and Luffy looked at the little reindeer expectantly. Canada/Chopper tried to steady his nerves.

"O-Okay… here I go!" He let himself fly off of the swing and landed perfectly on the ship's lawn, going exactly one foot from the swing.

"Boooo!" yelled Usopp. "C'mon, Chopper, what was that!?"

Luffy laughed. "Chopper, you gotta go farther than that! Like this!" He got on the swing and let himself go after half a minute, flying almost clear to the other end of the ship. Canada/Chopper gasped and applauded – or tried to. But upon finding that clapping was very difficult with hooves, he let his arms drop to his sides instead.

Usopp clapped. "Nice one, Luffy!" Then he looked at who he thought was Chopper. "Hey, Chopper, what's wrong?"

Canada/Chopper looked up. "That… that was amazing! That was even farther than what Al—" he stopped himself before he finished his sentence with "what Al can usually jump to." Usopp looked at him.

"Well…?"

"Eh, never mind!"

As Luffy ran back to the two, Usopp's nose suddenly twitched. He turned towards the kitchen, sniffing. "Hey, smells like breakfast's almost ready!"

"Breakfast? Food!" yelled Luffy.

France/Sanji leaned out of the kitchen. "Darling Nami-_san_! Robin-_chan_! Breakfast is ready, my dears! And the rest of you lot, too." He disappeared inside again and the crew soon congregated inside the dining room, where the blond cook had set up a big breakfast of bacon, French toast, crêpes with cream and berries, coffee with cream, breakfast puffs, scrambled eggs, devilled eggs, waffles, cheese omelets, and coffee with milk.

"_Petit-déjeuner est servi_!" He exclaimed, setting out utensils and plates.

"AWESOME, SANJI!" yelled Luffy.

"Not bad, shit-cook," muttered England/Zoro.

"Uwah! It all looks so good~!" cried Italy/Nami.

"Sweet! Sanji, I think you outdid yourself!" exclaimed Usopp.

"It looks really good, eh, Sanji," said Canada/Chopper.

"Wonderful, Sanji!" said Japan/Robin.

"WOW! SO MUCH FOOD!" yelled America/Franky.

Everyone dug in, putting a little bit of everything on their plates. America/Franky finished off an entire plateful in thirty seconds. "More!" he yelled, holding up his plate.

"Hey, Fraaaanky!" complained Luffy, finishing up his first plate. "Save some for the rest of us!"

"You're the one who usually eats the most, Luffy," pointed out England/Zoro, trying to hide his extreme enjoyment of the food.

Italy/Nami was eating eagerly, trying everything in sight. "It's all so good, Sanji~!"

"Thank you, Nami-_san_~!"

"Can I have more!?"

"Just grab some, Usopp."

Breakfast was finished within the next half-hour, everyone relaxing with their stomachs full. England/Zoro said that he was going to go work off some of the food. Japan/Robin said that he/she would head down to the aquarium to read a bit more, and Italy/Nami quickly decided to join him/her. Usopp announced that he would head down to the Usopp Factory to work on a new weapon – Luffy said that he was going to watch him. Canada/Chopper said very quietly that he would just sit and relax on the swing for a bit.

"Well, that's great and all," said America/Franky, whose hair was drooping, "but I'm kinda tired. I'm gonna go sleep."

"Um, did you try cola?" suggested Usopp as he and Luffy left the room. America/Franky lit up.

"Hey, good idea!" he went to the fridge and started rummaging around, eventually pulling out a bottle of cola. "Man, this is an awesome design of a bottle!"

As the men/girls left the room, he opened the bottle and took a swig. Wiping his lips, he frowned. "Hm… no, not really doing anything. Weird."

"Did you try putting it in your fridge?" asked England/Zoro, standing up and stretching.

"I don't know how that'll help, but…" America/Franky shrugged and put the cola bottle back in the refrigerator. "Yeah, it's not doing anything. Why'd you think that'd work?"

"Yeah, yeah, you're hilarious," said England/Zoro, heading out to lift weights in the crow's nest.

Canada/Chopper quietly snuck outside to sit on the swing and think about his situation, leaving America/Franky and France/Sanji in the kitchen.

"Oi, Franky," called the blond cook, "as long as you're here, how about helping me wash dishes?"

"Nope, sorry! Just remembered something I have to do! Important stuff! Bye!" he raced out of the room.

* * *

"So, Luffy…" Usopp said as he melted two pieces of metal together while Luffy held them down.

"Mm? What, Usopp?"

"Did you notice that Chopper, Nami, and Franky are acting kinda strange?"

"Strange?"

"Well…" Usopp put down the soldering iron and ticked off on his fingers. "Nami kissed Sanji, like, for a _really_ long time, and she usually shoves him away, right? Chopper seemed really scared about jumping off of the swing, and he didn't ask for seconds on that great breakfast! And speaking of which, Franky ate a lot more and faster than usual today. Plus, he didn't think of using cola to fuel up when he ran out."

"Hm…" Luffy thought for a minute, which looked like hard work. "Maybe they're just joking around?"

"…I don't think that they would do that. Especially not Nami, what with that kiss."

"Why don't we just ask them what's going on?"

"Sure. Next time we see one of them, we'll—"

"Hey! What's going on, guys?" came an obnoxiously loud voice from the top of the stairs. America/Franky appeared at the bottom, waving a huge hand. "How's it goin'?"

"Hi, Franky!" Luffy yelled. "We were just talking about you!"

Usopp glared at him. "Don't say it like _that_!"

"Hey, that little deer is really nice, isn't he?"

"Um, Chopper?" said Usopp. "Yeah, he's nice most of the time."

"Yeah, I was just pushing him on the swing a bit, and he goes…" America/Franky lowered his voice to a timid whisper. "'Eh, Franky, please stop pushing me so high… I think I might fall off…' And I'm like 'Haha, no way! Higher is better!' And he's like 'Please stop…' so I stopped and came down here."

"Hm… that doesn't really sound like Chopper… he likes to go really high…" Luffy crossed his arms and frowned.

"Oh, yeah, Franky," said Usopp, "are you feeling okay?"

"Kinda tired, but fine. Why?"

"It's just…" Usopp glanced at Luffy. "I was thinking that you were acting kinda weird…"

"How?"

"Well, you know, you ate really fast at breakfast."

"I was hungry and the food was tasty. In fact, you might say that…" he took off his sunglasses and put them back on. "…it was _good enough_ to _eat_!"

Luffy cracked up and Usopp stared. "Um…"

"Oh wait, that one didn't make any sense. I'll think of a better joke later."

"Uh-huh… so did you refuel?" Noting the still-drooping ducktail, Usopp muttered "Guess not…"

"Meh. I tried, but it didn't work. So the sword guy tells me to put the cola in my fridge, and I put it back in the fridge, but it doesn't do anything."

"I think he meant your compartment."

"Compartment?"

"…geez, never mind."

"Okay!" America/Franky gave a thumbs-up, and then glanced down at his forearms. He squinted at them and slowly put them together. Gasping, he said "Hey, guys! I just realized something _super-cool_ I can do!"

Lifting his forearms above his head, he put them together in such a way that the star tattoos formed an entire star. He leaned to one side and yelled "THE HERO!"

"…great, Franky. But you know – we've seen that before."

"Aw, really?" America/Franky let his arms droop sadly. "Anyway, I'm still tired…"

Luffy laughed. "See, Usopp, he and the rest are just joking around!"

Usopp sighed. He was getting nowhere with this. "Look, Franky, shouldn't you be checking up on the Sunny?"

"The weather? Yeah, the weather's sunny. What about it?"

"No, the ship."

"The ship's name is the Sunny!? That's so cool!"

"Oh, come on!" Usopp groaned. "If you _are _joking, it's not funny at all! You _know_ what the ship's name is! Just…" he paused. "Wait. This seems like the time Arthur switched bodies with Luffy…"

"Oh, the old guy?" asked Luffy.

"Yeah…"

America/Franky tilted his head. "Arthur?" he repeated, making sure that he had heard correctly.

"Yeah, Arthur… I guess you weren't around, were you? Long story short, an old guy named Arthur from another universe switched bodies with Luffy here. He switched himself and Luffy back eventually…" Usopp pointed dramatically at the cyborg. "You couldn't possibly be… _Arthur_!?"

"No, of course not."

"Oh." Usopp let his arm drop to his side. "Okay, just thought I'd check. Anyway, like I said, shouldn't you check up on the Sunny? I mean, being the shipwright and all…"

"Huh!? I'm not a shipwright!"

Usopp opened his mouth in confusion, but just then they heard a very familiar laugh above deck.

"_Pfe-fe-fe-fe-fe_!"


	5. In Which Prussia Shows up for No Reason

Back at America's house, Sanji/France was starting to speak. "So are _all_ of you countries, or is it just this man, England, and America?"

"Wait, what?" Nami/Italy frowned. "Countries?"

"Oh, that's right," said Spain, "America told you last time, didn't he? Well, yes, all of us are countries. I suppose that the rest of you lot don't know, so I'll explain…"

* * *

"Interesting," said Robin/Japan, studying the globe that Korea had brought down. "There's so much land…"

"Yeah, but our world is like…" Romano frowned. "What is it, like two-thirds ocean? Yeah, that sounds right."

Robin/Japan smiled. "I believe that our world would be approximately 90% ocean."

"Huh!"

There came a knock at the door upstairs. Spain rose to answer it, but the door was opening, shutting, and footsteps came down the stairs. Prussia's face appeared in the doorway.

"Hey!" he called. "I finally got away from West! Is the party still going on?"

Korea said "Well… not exactly, but, you know, feel free to stay."

Franky/America jerked a thumb at Prussia. "Oi, who's he?"

"America, you know me!" Prussia thumped a fist to his chest. "I'm the Awesome Prussia, at your service! Just kidding, I'm not going to serve you."

England/Zoro scowled. "You're too loud."

"I'm _awesomely_ loud, though!"

"No," sighed Nami/Italy, "you're just loud. Do us all a favor and shut the hell up."

Prussia gaped at her/him. "Ita, what the hell?"

Romano grinned. "Is something wrong, bastard?"

"Um, _yeah_, something's wrong – with Ita! Since when does he say 'shut the hell up'?"

"Since he felt like it, maybe?"

"Sorry, but who are you?" asked Chopper/Canada. Prussia stared at him.

"Wait, who are _you_? Wait, you're… America's brother, right?"

Spain sighed. "Prussia, sit down a minute, will you? You should probably hear this."

* * *

"So you guys are all from some weird universe and you're just waiting for England to fix stuff," summed up Prussia. General nodding went around the room.

"Hopefully he'll pull something like he did last time and manage to get us all back to normal," muttered Zoro/England. Nami/Italy nodded her/his agreement.

"Anyway, there're leftovers in the fridge from last night," said Spain, nodding towards it. "Have some if anyone wants any."

Nobody was particularly hungry, however, so the nations opted to watch TV.

"TV?" Franky/America frowned. "What the hell is a TV?"

"…it's _so_ weird to hear America saying that." Spain pointed to a smallish black box sitting on top of a cabinet. "Here, this is a TV." He walked over and switched it on – it started showing a news station, talking about some car crash on some freeway. The pirates gathered around it in fascination.

"Wow, cool! Does this use a Transponder Snail in some way?"

"Transponder Snail?" Romano looked at Chopper/Canada. "What the fuck is a Transponder Snail?"

"Never mind."

The news cut to the commercials. The first commercial was for a company called Funim… something. Some kind of anime company. South Korea's eyes widened. "Oh shit." He quickly shut off the TV.

"Hey! What was that for!?" said Nami/Italy angrily. Korea coughed.

"Uh," said Korea, waving his arms frantically, "that ad was for a company that we hate! That's all."

"I see…" Zoro/England approached the TV, picking up a curtain rod along the way (which had fallen from the party the previous night). "So if that company uses this… _TV_…"

He readied the rod like a _katana_. "_Ichitoryu_… Stab of the Rhino's Horn!" He thrusted the rod through the television screen, shattering the glass completely. Romano glared at him.

"Nice going, jackass. Now we can't use it at all."

"But at least a harboring point for the evil company is gone." Zoro tossed aside the curtain rod.

Spain protested "They're not _evil_, necessarily! We just happen to dislike them!"

Sanji/France laughed. "Ooh, looks like _Marimo_ messed up~!"

"_YOU _SHUT UP!" yelled Zoro/England, flushing. "It was an honest mistake!"

"A mistake that only you or Luffy would make," pointed out Nami/Italy.

* * *

**Really quick: A couple of people were wondering why they hate Funimation. It's not that they don't like Funimation; Korea recognized Funimation from the logo, and remembered that Funimation has One Piece. So he was worried that if the ad showed different animes as an example, One Piece might show up. Spain wasn't sure what was going on, but he knew that Korea was up to something, so he played along.**

**Thing is, they don't want the pirates finding out that they're just a cartoon in this world.**


	6. In Which the Six Are Found Out

Usopp and Luffy rushed up to the deck. America/Franky shrugged and followed them.

Up on deck, the rest of the crew had gathered, facing very familiar enemies: Foxy, Porche, and Hamburg. Foxy was laughing, Hamburg was giggling, and Porche was sneering.

"_Pfe-fe-fe-fe-fe_! You Strawhats are certainly unlucky today!" cackled Foxy. "I've come to take my revenge at last!"

Luffy tilted his head. "You're… Split-Head, right?"

"Split…" Foxy fell to the ground in severe depression.

"Oh~! Choppy~!" Porche danced over to Canada/Chopper and picked him up. "You're still _adorable_!" she nuzzled him. He started squirming.

"A-Adorable? I'm not…" he whispered. "Um, can you put me down? Please?"

"Put him down!" yelled Usopp. "You can't have him! We won him back fair and square!"

"Not when I challenge you to another Davy Back Fight!" Foxy struck a pose. "Or I can simply defeat you with pure force!"

Canada/Chopper wiggled out of Porche's arms. Italy/Nami hid behind a pole. "Okay, I surrender! Don't hit me!"

"Nami, what are you doing?" demanded England/Zoro. "You have to fight too!"

"Nami-_san_ doesn't have to fight if she doesn't want to!" yelled France/Sanji. "She's a lady!"

"We'll settle this later, ero-cook." England/Zoro readied his swords.

"Excuse me…" said a timid voice near Usopp's knees. He looked down to see Canada/Chopper looking up at him.

"Chopper? What is it?"

"Um, if we're going to fight them, may I please borrow a gun?"

Usopp stared at him. "A gun? I don't have a gun! I think Sanji has one, but… why don't you just fight like you usually do?"

"Oh, right! I'll do that…" Canada/Chopper started trying to figure out how the little reindeer would usually fight. Eventually he decided on lowering his head and charging the enemy with his horns. Foxy slowed him down with a Slow-Slow Beam.

"Chopper!" yelled Luffy. "Split-Head, you'd better watch out!"

Usopp looked at the reindeer. "What… did he not remember the beam?"

Japan/Robin crossed his/her arms and held back Foxy's fingers with well-placed arms. Italy/Nami momentarily forgot about the Devil Fruit power that England had spoken of and shrieked, scrambling away from the arms. America/Franky yelled that that was _so cool_, while Canada/Chopper's speed returned to normal. He shook himself, saw the arms, and cried out, hiding behind Usopp – the correct way, not in the way that the reindeer usually did it.

"A-Arms!" yelled Italy/Nami. "There're arms coming out of him! He's a monster!"

"A monster!?" yelled America/Franky. "That's so cool! Does he shoot lasers? Or maybe he's a robot!"

"Split-Head's a _laser robot_!?" exclaimed Luffy. Usopp smacked him.

Italy/Nami hid behind France/Sanji. "P-Please protect me…" he/she whimpered.

"Of course, darling. Just promise I'll be… _rewarded_ later, if you catch my drift."

"A-Anything!"

England/Zoro, Usopp, Luffy, and Japan/Robin managed to kick the now bruised Foxy, Porche, and Hamburg back to their rowboat.

"You'll regret this!" yelled Porche as she rowed them and their injured boss away.

"Bye, Split-Head!" yelled Luffy, waving.

* * *

"So…"

Usopp, Luffy, Italy/Nami, Canada/Chopper, and America/Franky sat in the dining room, now a makeshift interrogation room. The rest waited outside.

"What exactly is going on? Don't tell me that you don't know what I'm talking about," he added quickly, "you know _perfectly well _what I'm talking about. Nami!"

Italy/Nami didn't look up. When he/she realized that Usopp meant him/her, he/she quickly looked up. "Um, y-yes?"

"Until today, you've never kissed Sanji – well, as far as I know. I mean, you've hugged him, like, _once_, but that's about it. You weren't willing to fight at all when Foxy showed up, and you sort of freaked when you saw Robin's power!"

"Oh, that's right… she has that weird power… I, um—"

"Chopper," continued Usopp, "You didn't seem as excited about going high on the swing as you usually do, you didn't have seconds at breakfast, and you also seemed scared about the power. Plus, you didn't hide like you usually do and you seemed to forget about Foxy's power – and you asked to borrow a gun."

"Well…" whispered Canada/Chopper, but Usopp got up from the table.

"Hold on." He walked over to the corner, where an ear had been planted. "Oi, Robin? Can you not listen in, please? I'll tell you guys what happened after we're done, I promise."

The ear vanished in a shower of petals. Usopp sat back down and continued talking.

"And Franky… well, you've just been weird. You ate way too quickly at breakfast, you didn't know what I meant when I mentioned your compartment – and for that matter, you didn't refuel with cola. You acted like making a star with your forearms was something new, and you said that you weren't a shipwright, _and_ you said that you didn't know the ship's name was the Sunny!"

"But I _didn't_ know!" protested America/Franky.

"This is exactly what I'm talking about!" yelled Usopp.

"Oh!" Luffy laughed. "So _this_ is what you meant, Usopp!"

"Quiet, you. Now…" Usopp looked at the group of three with the most menacing gaze he could affix to his face. "This seems _very_ familiar to the time when Arthur switched bodies with Luffy."

"Arthur? You mean England?" said Canada/Chopper. America/Franky and Italy/Nami turned to stare at him. He shrank back. "I mean…"

"You know Arthur!?" exclaimed Luffy. "The old guy!?"

"Wait…" America/Franky leaned in to stare at Canada/Chopper. "Are you… Mattie!?"

"A-Al?"

"Mattie! It _is_ you!" America/Franky picked up Canada/Chopper and put him on his shoulders. "I didn't know anyone here! Man, am I glad you're here!"

"You two know each other?" said Usopp.

"Wait… America?" asked Italy/Nami. "And America's brother?"

"Italy?" asked America/Franky. "Cool, you're here too!"

They eventually explained the situation to Usopp and Luffy.

"Oh, so you guys know Arthur…" Usopp sighed. "That's good… I guess this thing is his fault again?"

"Yeah, I guess so," laughed America/Franky. "We're just waiting for him to fix it, actually."

"Okay! I guess we can tell the others, then!" Luffy stood up and the rest followed suit.

Outside, England/Zoro, France/Sanji, and Japan/Robin looked up as the five others exited the dining room. "Oi, guys!" said Usopp happily. "You remember when Arthur switched bodies with Luffy?"

Hesitant nods.

"Well, turns out that _all three_ of these guys switched with people who know Arthur! Isn't that weird?" he turned to the three. "What were your names again?"

"I-Italy… nice to meet you all!"

"Canada… same here."

"America! I'm the hero, just so you know!"

"It's so weird," laughed Usopp. "It's good that you three weren't switched, though!"

England/Zoro coughed. France/Sanji started whistling. Japan/Robin looked away.

"Guys…?" Usopp frowned. "What's wrong?"

England/Zoro spoke. "Well, I'll just say that I wasn't expecting this git to show up." He pointed to America/Franky. "That's all."

"Iggy?" cried America/Franky. "You're here too?"

"_Angleterre_, is that you?" asked France/Sanji.

"Wh – frog!?"

Usopp stared at them. "Arthur? And Arthur's friend?"

"And me," said Japan/Robin. "I believe that it's time for me to give up this façade."

"Okay… I'm confused…" Luffy fell on his back. "Who's who now?"

* * *

"Alright!" Usopp laughed. "Now that we've got all that sorted out… Arthur, what're you gonna do about this?"

"This is a bit awkward… you see," admitted England/Zoro, "I didn't cause this. I don't know who or what did, but if I could have the spell book that I used last time, that would be perfect."

Usopp scratched the back of his neck in embarrassment. "Erm… the thing is… we all thought it was kinda dangerous. We were gonna burn it, but then Robin started threatening us with our lives, so I think Nami sold it at Water 7."

"Perfect," he muttered. "Just perfect."

"Well, I'm fine staying here if my dear _angleterre_ is here as well~!" France/Sanji hugged England/Zoro, a sight which was very odd to Usopp and Luffy.

"Wait…" France/Sanji let go of England/Zoro and looked at Italy/Nami. "You're Italy, right?"

"Uh-huh!"

"So…" France looked horrified. "When you kissed me earlier…"

There was a moment of silence.

"AAAH! I KISSED BIG BROTHER FRANCE!"

"ITA KISSED ME! BUT HE WAS A WOMAN! I DIDN'T KNOW!"

"AAAH THIS IS SO WEIRD!"

"A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN KISSED ME BUT IT WAS REALLY ITALY!"

"I KISSED A HANDSOME GUY BUT IT WAS BIG BROTHER FRANCE!"

"AAAAAH!"


	7. In Which America Is Surprised

Once Italy/Nami and France/Sanji had calmed down, England/Zoro asked "Usopp? This ship has a Transponder Snail, doesn't it?"

"Um, yeah, it's inside… why?"

"I was just wondering… your Transponder Snail last time had these strange symbols on it instead of the numbers that I'm used to. Do you think I could take a look at this one?"

"Sure," he shrugged. He led England/Zoro to the Snail. The others followed them.

"Here it is," he said. England/Zoro leaned forward and studied the buttons.

"Wait…" he muttered. "These are… numbers."

"What'd you expect?"

"But—" He turned around and glared at Usopp. "What the hell were those weird symbols on the last Snail!?"

"Oh!" laughed Luffy. "Usopp and I drew on the buttons!"

England/Zoro banged his head on the wall.

"What're you doing, Zoro—I mean, Arthur?"

"Never mind," said England through gritted teeth. He picked up the receiver on the Snail.

"Are you going to try dialing Al's house?" said Canada/Chopper quietly.

"Hm?" England/Zoro looked around until he spotted the reindeer. "Yes, but I don't think that just the number by itself will work… it doesn't hurt to try, I suppose…"

He dialed the number and waited. While it was ringing, Luffy snatched the receiver from him. Someone picked up on the other end.

"Yes?" said the person.

"Hey, is this… um…"

"Alfred Jones' house," whispered England/Zoro.

"Is this Alfred Jones' house?"

"Wait a minute…" said the person. "I know that voice…"

"Hey, Arthur!" said Luffy happily. "I think we have the right place!"

There was some muffled talking on the other end – apparently the person was saying something to someone else with the receiver covered. They spoke again.

"Yes, this is Alfred Jones' house," said another person in a gruff voice. America/Franky frowned.

"I don't recognize either of those voices… who are they?"

The first voice said "Could you please give us your coordinates right now?"

"Sure!" said Luffy. "I just have to check the maps…"

"Wait, Luffy," whispered Usopp. "Something's not right here."

America/Franky took the receiver from Luffy. "Hey, um, who is this exactly?"

"…this is Alfred Jones, of course. That is, he's next to me…" said the first voice.

"Imposter!" yelled America. "_I'm_ Alfred Jones!"

"Oh, no! Captain Smoker, our cover's blown!"

"Hang up the goddamn receiver, Tashigi!"

_Kacha_

There was general silence whilst everyone stared at the Snail.

"Um… what was that?" asked Italy/Nami.

"The Marines," muttered England/Zoro. "Alfred, your telephone number here calls the Marines."

"Hey, the Marines are awesome! And brave, and—"

"Not in this world," said France/Sanji. "At least, not to pirates."

"…oh."

"Look, I'm going to try and figure out how to dial our universe," said England/Zoro. "It might take a while."

"Kay!" America/Franky took Canada/Chopper and put him on his shoulders again.

"Al, please don't put me on your shoulders…"

"Hey, nothing you can do about it!" said America/Franky happily. "I mean, you're pretty tiny right now!"

Japan/Robin whispered something to Canada/Chopper. The latter nodded and suddenly grew to about six feet high. He fell off of America/Franky's shoulders.

"Dude! What the freaking hell!?"

"I believe you may have forgotten," said France/Sanji, "but our dear Kiku mentioned that the reindeer can change his form."

"That…" America/Franky stared at Canada/Chopper. "That is the coolest thing I've ever heard! Wait…" he frowned and thought. "Didn't you say something last night about this guy, Franky or whoever?"

"No, he only said that he's a pervert," said England/Zoro quickly. Everyone else looked at him in confusion.

"Um, England, what—" said Italy/Nami.

"Quiet," muttered England/Zoro. "This is one time where I'd rather delay the inevitable."

"Inevitable?" asked America/Franky. "What d'you mean?"

"Nothing!" exclaimed France/Sanji. "Nothing at all!"

"Well, okay…" America/Franky shrugged. "You know, I'm still really tired. Maybe I need more food!"

He patted his stomach area and looked down in confusion at the metal sound that came from it. "What…"

Feeling around, he found a ridge and pulled, revealing his compartment of empty cola bottles. He took them out, looked at them, and looked up. "Okay, someone tell me what's going on."

They sighed and explained it to him.

"I…" he grinned. "I have no words to express just how FUCKING HAPPY I AM RIGHT NOW!"

"Alfred, please don't go using your weapons and things," sighed England/Zoro.

"Actually, Arthur-_san_…" said Japan/Robin, "he may need to know in case of an attack. I shall take the responsibility of instructing him."

"Japan, you are my best friend."


	8. In Which No Progress Is Made

America/Franky had spent the last thirty minutes or so annoying everyone with his weapons when England/Zoro shouted from the room "Everyone, I figured it out! I think this might be it!"

The Transponder Snail was ringing when the others rushed into the room. "Are you sure this isn't another false alarm," said America/Franky, "when a few minutes ago you said that you got it and you ended up calling some chick who threatened to turn you to sto—"

"No, I'm not sure, but I have a good feeling about it," said England/Zoro firmly.

Someone on the other end picked up. "Uh, hi! This is Alfred F. Jones' house… he's not home right now, but I can take a message!"

"What the hell is this?" said someone in the background. "Is this thing like a Transponder Snail?"

"You did it, Iggy!" yelled America/Franky. "Hey, what was the number, anyway?"

"Well, actually… Japan, you know that thing that—"

"Sh! Someone's talking!"

* * *

"Whoa, whoa…" Romano grabbed the phone from Korea. "Burger bastard, was that you?"

"You know it, baby!"

"Romaaaano!" Someone else's voice came from the phone. "Romaaano, is that you~?"

"Veneziano! Thank God it's you! Listen, there's a crazy chick in your body, and—"

Nami/Italy grabbed him. "_Who_'s a crazy chick?"

"Eek! Don't hurt me!"

"R-Romano? Was that my voice?"

Nami/Italy dropped him and grabbed the phone. "Hey, you! Give me back my precious body!"

"Eek! Don't hurt me! Oh, wait, you're really far away… I-I'm sorry!" Italy/Nami hid behind France/Sanji. "I wanna give it back, but I can't!"

Zoro/England took the phone from Nami/Italy, much to Sanji/France's protests. "Oi, Luffy, Usopp, you there?"

"Zoro!" cried Luffy. "Zoro, is that you!?"

"Yeah, it's me. You got any idea what to do about all this?"

* * *

England/Zoro took the receiver again. "Er, well… we're working on that. You see, it's not my fault that this happened, and apparently the book that I used last time was sold."

"Oh, that's right!" exclaimed Nami/Italy. "I got a pretty good price for it, too."

"That's not really the point!" yelled Romano. Nami/Italy glared at him again.

"Veneziano, get back here soon! This chick is scary!"

"And I have to deal with my Nami-_swan_ and Robin-_chwan_ being in the bodies of _men_!" Sanji/France shuddered.

"Except for the hair and eyebrows, my _angleterre_ hasn't changed much~." France/Sanji snuggled up to England/Zoro.

"Wait, what?"

Canada/Chopper explained the situation with England and France.

"So…" Sanji/France looked horrified. "_My_ body is being lovey-dovey with that stupid moss-head!? That's disgusting! Women are the only ones for me!"

"Oh, don't be so stiff," said France/Sanji, getting up after being punched by England/Zoro. "Love can come in all shapes and sizes! I'm sure that if you gave it a chance, you and your green-haired friend could become _very_ intimate with each other~!"

For the next few minutes, angry and incoherent yelling came from both Zoro/England and Sanji/France. They calmed down soon enough after releasing some tension by fighting each other, and communications came back on.

"Dude!" yelled America/Franky, grabbing the receiver from Canada/Chopper. "Dude who's in my body! Your body is AWESOME! How did you get to be a freaking cyborg!? Were you born that way!? Was your dad a robot and your mom a human or something!? How—"

"Whoa, calm down!" yelled Franky/America. "I made myself into a cyborg because I was dying! But you're right, my body is _su~per _awesome!"

America/Franky opened his mouth again, but England/Zoro took the receiver from him. "Anyway… how have things been going on your end?"

"Well, the stupid moss-head here broke the… the… what-do-you-call-it… the TV."

"IT WAS A MISTAKE!"

"TV?" asked Usopp.

"Aw… so your TV's broken, America?" asked Italy/Nami.

"Um…" America/Franky scratched his head. "Well… if it was the one in the basement, it wasn't my TV."

"Whose was it?" asked England/Zoro, frowning.

America/Franky coughed. "Yours. I sort of stole it a while ago as revenge… and I was kinda surprised you didn't notice, actually."

England/Zoro banged his head against the wall. "Why. Is. It. That. Every. Time. This. Happens. My. TV. Gets. Broken."

"It's clearly retribution for your horrible cooking."

"What the _hell_ does that have to do with ANYTHING!?"

"It's food. You're tarnishing food when you cook. Food is _sacred_, Iggy. Gosh."

England/Zoro looked like he was going to scream in frustration.

Luffy laughed. "You guys are really funny!"

"Oh yeah," said Romano, "the albino bastard's here too."

"Prussia?"

"The one and only!" yelled Prussia from the other end.

"What are you doing there, man!?" exclaimed America/Franky.

"Just decided to show up and now I'm chilling with everyone here!"

"Wait."

Everyone on the Sunny turned to Usopp, who was looking nervous.

"We haven't checked the ship's course in a while…"

…

"We'll call you back later, everyone!"

_Kacha_

* * *

**Completion of England's response:**

**"Well, actually... Japan, you know that thing that you sometimes call Italy by? All I had to do was put that in front of Alfred's number."**

**In other words, it was 'H-E-T-A-L-I-A-[America's number]'**


	9. In Which England Is Left Alone

The ship was starting to go off course into a storm, so England/Zoro and France/Sanji fixed it back on track. An island was coming up. They managed to dock and decided to go off and get supplies.

"So, um…" Usopp said, looking around. "Do you guys mind helping get food and stuff? I mean, it'd be kinda difficult with just Luffy and me…"

"Yeah, sure!" yelled America/Franky.

"Of course I'll help," said Canada/Chopper quietly.

"If you want me to," nodded Japan/Robin.

"I'll help~!" cried Italy/Nami.

"I'll come. You'll probably need me for the food anyway," said France/Sanji.

"I'll just stay and guard the ship, if you don't mind," said England/Zoro. "I'm fairly skilled with sword-fighting, even if it isn't three swords."

"Yeah, just don't try to cook!" said Usopp, hopping off of the Sunny.

America/Franky laughed while England/Zoro glowered.

The seven headed into town. After a bit of talking, they split up into three groups: America/Franky, France/Sanji, and Italy/Nami would restock on food; Canada/Chopper and Usopp would look for medicinal supplies; Luffy and Japan/Robin went to look for books on magic that could possibly help England/Zoro.

* * *

"Let's get a lot of hamburger meat! And hot dogs! And—"

"—and pasta! And grapes! And gelato! And—"

"—potatoes! Watermelon! Popcorn!"

"More pasta! Apples! Tomatoes!"

"Will you two _please_ shut up for a moment?"

France/Sanji, America/Franky, and Italy/Nami stood in a food shop. America/Franky and Italy/Nami were very eager to get food, but France/Sanji seemed to have his own ideas.

"Now, since I'm the cook, we're going to get what _I_ decide on. Besides, I'm not only the country of love, but the country of the best cuisine in the world~!"

"Pft," muttered America. "The best-cuisine country in _your_ country, maybe."

"…that didn't even make sense."

"It does if you're an American."

"Well, that explains why it sounded idiotic. Now, we must restock on flour, coffee beans, milk…" he continued listing ingredients while America/Franky and Italy/Nami wandered away to look at the food.

* * *

"So, um… what was your name again?"

Usopp and Canada/Chopper were in a drugstore, browsing the shelves for medical supplies. The latter looked up.

"M-My name's Canada… but you can call me Matthew if you want," he said quietly.

"Okay… so do you know anything about medicine, or…?"

"A little bit… I'm not a doctor, but I know some first aid."

"So…" Usopp looked around. "Do you know which medicines we should get?"

"Well…" Canada/Chopper looked around. "These medicines look different from what I'm used to at home… so… I'm sorry, but no…"

"…well, I vote we grab what looks useful."

"But—"

Usopp had already started towards the shelves.

"Never mind," whispered Canada/Chopper.

* * *

Luffy and Japan/Robin entered the bookshop. Luffy started looking around excitedly. "Whoa! So many books! Hey, there's some with bright colors! Can we get those?"

"Perhaps, Luffy-_san_," replied Japan/Robin. "Will you please help me look for a book on magic?"

"Magic?"

"Do you remember the book that Arthur-_san_ used to switch himself and you back to normal when the first body-swap occurred?"

Luffy thought hard. "Um… I think so…"

"We're looking for a book that looks like that."

"Oh! Okay!"

About ten minutes later, Luffy and Japan/Robin had found five books on magic: _The Standard Book of Spells_, _Magical Theory_, _A Guide to Advanced Transfiguration_, _Advanced Potion-Making_, and _One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi_.

"Do you think that all these'll help?" asked Luffy eagerly.

"Maybe they will. It depends on what type of magic Arthur-_san_ is planning to perform."

"There're different kinds!?" exclaimed Luffy in surprise as he and Japan/Robin walked out the door with the books in a sack.

"Yes. One kind, for example, is with a wand. Another kind is mixing up a potion."

"Potion?"

"A magical liquid."

"Hm…" Luffy thought. "So… if I drank a potion… would I become magical?"

"Let us all pray that that never happens, Luffy-_san_."

"I don't really get it… but okay!"


	10. In Which Chopper Is Taken for a Ride

**I'm sorry for the wait, everyone...**

* * *

Sanji/France had ended up making a mid-morning snack for everyone, but with that finished off, no one had any ideas about what to do to pass the time.

"I'm bored," muttered Prussia. Zoro/England might have said that he was bored, but he was sleeping at the moment.

"Yeah, well, if we had anything to do, we'd be doing it," replied Nami/Italy.

The phone rang, startling everyone. Zoro snapped awake, looked around, and relaxed again.

"I'll get it," Spain offered. He picked up the phone and said "Hello?"

There was a moment's pause, and he put his hand over the phone and whispered "It's America's Marines. Hold on a moment."

He went back to the phone and said "Er, about that… he's not actually here right now. This is Spain. Where is he? Well… that's a bit complicated… could I take a message? Right… right…" he wrote something down. "Okay. I'll let him know. You have a good day too!"

He hung up the phone and turned around to find himself, Prussia, Romano, and Korea being held at the end of some kind of weapon by Zoro/England, Franky/America, Nami/Italy, and Sanji/France respectively. The rest stood back and on guard.

"Okay, what—"

"If you're planning to turn us in to your Marines, you're gonna have a real job ahead of you," said Nami/Italy with an evil grin. Romano flinched.

"Anyone got any rope?" asked Zoro/England.

"Wait, wait, time out," said Prussia, looking down Franky/America's fist, "before you do anything, what the hell!?"

* * *

"So, basically, you're not going to turn us in," Zoro/England said.

"You mentioned an Air Force, too?" asked Nami/Italy. "What's an Air Force?"

"Well…" Spain scratched his head. "It's the branch of the military… that's in the air."

"How do they get up in the air?" asked Chopper/Canada curiously. "Are there flying machines or something?"

"Pretty much, yeah," said Romano. "Actually, I think America has one out back… it's kinda old, but… oh. Oh, thank god none of us got out there and tried to fly it last night."

"Why?" asked Sanji/France.

"We were all wasted."

"Oh."

"Hey, there _is_ one!" yelled Prussia. "Man, this takes me back!"

They went outside to see a Curtiss Model J in perfect condition, sitting in a hangar that was only a small portion of the much larger backyard.

"WOW! SO COOL!" Chopper/Canada proceeded to go nuts over every detail on the airplane. Franky/America went up and examined it.

"Interesting… this thing can really fly?"

Spain shrugged. "Hey, that's what we all said at first and now…"

Before anyone could stop him, Franky/America had hopped into the pilot's seat (taking Chopper/Canada into the passenger's seat), started up the plane, and taken off.

"OI, FRANKY!"

"That idiot…"

Yet Franky was doing just fine keeping the machine up in the air. He was even doing stunts now, like diving down and suddenly bringing it back up. Chopper/Canada was shrieking with excitement.

Unfortunately, the engine started smoking. Korea noticed this and began to panic.

"Bring her down!" he yelled. "BRING HER DOWN! THE ENGINE'S SMOKING!"

Franky/America glanced behind him, nodded, and carefully brought down the plane, bringing it to a bouncy stop. He and Chopper/Canada climbed out.

"So, um…" Prussia coughed. "Should we tell America about this when he gets back?"

"No."

"Probably not."

"Yeah, no."

"Except that the engine needs to be fixed."

…

"Hey, leave it to the great Franky!" Franky/America grinned. "Just get me a tool kit and I'll be all set!"

* * *

"Good job," said Korea approvingly, examining the engine. "You can't even tell it was ever broken…"

"Yup!" said Franky/America, rubbing grease off of his self. "I polished it a bit, too, so it should be better than before!

"So… what say I take her out for another spin again?"

"YEAH—"

"NO."

"Aw…" Chopper/Canada looked down.

* * *

**Also, I'm really sorry about short chapters :( I try to make them longer, but... **

**...**

***runs away***


	11. In Which Luffy Has the Solution

**I deeply apologize for uploading later than I had intended *bows head in shame***

* * *

"So… are these any help, Arthur?" asked Usopp as England/Zoro scanned the books.

"Well, I do appreciate it, I really do," he replied, skimming through the one on transfiguration. "But I'm not finding anything right now. Could you give me maybe ten minutes?"

"Sure. By the way, Francis wants to know why the kitchen has burn marks on it."

"I don't know," said England/Zoro quickly, turning away. Usopp narrowed his eyes and walked around to look at him.

"Arthur…"

"Look, all I did was walk in the kitchen! I just wanted to get some leftovers from the fridge! The next thing I know, there's a fire! And I _did_ try to clean it up afterwards!"

Usopp sighed. "Maybe there's some kind of lock that can keep you out… I'll talk to Sanji about it." He went away, calling back "Tell us if you find anything!"

"…not like I'm going to keep it secret if I do…" he muttered to himself, setting down the book on transfiguration.

* * *

England/Zoro called everyone to the room he was in within the next five minutes.

"Did you find something, Iggy?" asked America/Franky.

"Well, I appreciate you two getting the books for me," he said, nodding to Japan/Robin and Luffy, "I really do. But I couldn't find anything suitable for our purpose."

"You mean you didn't find anything?" asked Canada/Chopper quietly.

"No, I didn't find anything that would work in this case. The one that I used last time would be perfect, but seeing as we no longer have that book… I suppose that our best option would be to look for another copy somewhere."

Luffy raised a finger. "Um…"

"So we might be stuck like this for a long time!?" yelled America/Franky.

"Guys, I might have—" tried Luffy again.

"Yes," said England/Zoro. "I'm afraid so."

Luffy shrugged and stopped trying to talk.

"Does anyone know approximately when we'll reach the next island?" asked Japan/Robin. Everyone looked around at everyone else and they all realized that no, they did not know.

Italy/Nami sighed. "I wanna see _fratello_ again…" France/Sanji went to comfort him/her.

"Luffy, what did you and Zoro do before Nami joined the crew?" asked England/Zoro.

"Uh… we just kind of sailed around aimlessly."

Usopp looked at him. "Jeez, you guys were lucky you survived!"

"Well, Nami joined us pretty soon, so that was fine!" he laughed.

"Does anyone have any maps?" continued England/Zoro. "We might find our way from there."

"We do, but…" Usopp scratched the back of his head. "We don't have any maps of where we are right now."

"Oh, that's right…" muttered England/Zoro. "Great."

They continued talking and decided to hope for the best with the next island, and in the meantime, go and do some recreational activities.

Italy/Nami got up and stretched, notably cheerier. "Well, I'm bored now! Is there any paper I can use to draw on?"

Luffy dug around in his pocket and handed him/her a piece of paper with some writing on one side. "Here, Nami – I mean, Italy! Use the back of this!"

"Thanks, Luffy!" He/she took the paper and went out onto the deck, where there was better light. He/she found a pen somewhere and got to drawing.

* * *

Later, Japan/Robin went onto the deck to talk to Italy/Nami. "What is that you're drawing, Italy-_kun_?"

Italy/Nami looked up. "Hi, Japan~! I'm drawing everyone on this crew!" He/she lifted the paper to show him/her a drawing of Luffy, Zoro, Usopp, Sanji, Chopper, Robin, and a half-complete Franky. Japan/Robin nodded.

"Those are very good. If you don't mind my asking, where did you get the paper?"

"Luffy gave it to me! He said I could draw on the back!"

"I see… and what's on the other side?"

"Um…" Italy/Nami flipped the paper over and examined it. "I don't know what this is… it looks weird… wait, was this torn out of a book?"

"May I see that?"

Italy/Nami handed the paper to Japan/Robin, who examined the drawings and words on it. He/she raised his/her eyebrows.

"Italy-_kun_…"

"Hm?"

"I think we should gather everyone together."

"Why? Oh well." Italy/Nami yelled for everyone. They all gathered to the deck fairly quickly.

"What is it?" asked Canada/Chopper quietly.

Japan/Robin handed the paper to England/Zoro. "England-_san_, will you please take a look at this?"

England/Zoro took the paper and examined it. His mouth dropped open. "This is—!"

"I believe that Luffy-_san_ had it."

England glared at Luffy. "Why didn't you tell us you had this!?"

"I was _trying_ to," he whined, "but everyone else was talking!"

"What? What's the paper, Arthur?" Usopp tried to take a look at it.

"The solution to our problem. It seems Luffy tore this out of the book and had it this whole time."

Usopp yelled "Luffy, why didn't you tell us in the beginning!?"

"I didn't think that was the one everyone needed."

France/Sanji sighed. "There's nothing we can do about that now. _Angleterre, ma chérie_, how long will you need to prepare everything?"

"I'd say, at most, twenty minutes. And if you absolutely _have_ to call me 'dear', kindly do _not_ use the feminine form!"

France pouted. "But it suits you so well—"

"Go away!"

* * *

**In French (and several other languages) nouns have a "gender". For example, in French, a chair is a feminine noun (la chaise), while a hat is a masculine noun (le chapeau). I don't know why. **

**France is using the feminine version of "dear" (chérie) to refer to England when he should use the masculine form (cher), since England is a man.**

**Anyway, looks like I'll be wrapping up this story fairly soon.**


	12. In Which Things Are Relatively Normal

**Last chapter! **

* * *

Korea, Romano, and Spain were trying to break up Zoro/England and Sanji/France's fight (while everyone else watched) when the telephone rang. Prussia jumped up and ran to the phone, yelling "I got it!"

He picked it up and said "Hey, you've reached Best Time of Your Life, the number one role-play phone sex hotline in the world! If you want regular sex, press 69. If you want it weird, press pound to reach our specialist on everything from ropes to handcuffs to spanking! If you called because you're lonely and desperate, hang up right now because we don't have time for your shit."

A spurt of laughter came from the other end. A different voice said "Prussia, shut up and listen will you? Actually, put the phone on speaker so that everyone can hear me."

"Oh, hey, England." Prussia pressed the speakerphone button and England/Zoro's voice was amplified. "Guys, it's everyone else."

They crowded around the phone.

"Everyone there? Well, anyway," continued England/Zoro, "we found a solution. I've made some tweaks to the process, so hopefully it will work better than it did last time. Okay, now pay attention here…"

* * *

"So we all stand here?" asked Nami/Italy for confirmation. Everyone nodded, with a few saying "Yes." The ones who had switched stood close together in the center of the chalk circle, surrounded by strange symbols drawn on the floor. England/Zoro had instructed them to stand there until he could bring them over to the Sunny. Meanwhile, Franky/America was holding a pack of Mentos, which America/Franky had instructed him to bring so that he could demonstrate something.

"How long do we have to—?" began Franky/America, just before they began sinking into the floor. Since none of them had experienced it before, almost everyone clutched someone near them and started to panic.

"Um, this is supposed to happen, remember?" said Spain, standing just outside the now glowing chalk circle. "It's okay."

They relaxed, but only a little bit. Their torsos were now sinking in. Some held their breath as if about to dive underwater.

Finally, they sank entirely into the floor. The circle's blue glow faded. The nations stared at the spot where they had disappeared.

* * *

Back at the Sunny, England/Zoro had finished chanting. Slowly, six heads came up through the center of the circle with a red glow, growing to the chests, the hips, and finally the feet. The circle stopped glowing and everyone that had come through stepped off of it. They looked at those who were already there, smiled, and went up to them.

Chopper/Canada ran up to Luffy and Usopp with a big grin. "Guys! Hi! It's me, Chopper!"

"Chopper!" cried Usopp. "Is it really you? We missed you!"

"Missed…" Chopper/Canada started dancing. "I-I don't care if you missed me or not, you bastard~!"

"That's Chopper, definitely!" laughed Luffy.

Nami/Italy was approaching Italy/Nami with an accusing expression. "You _better_ not have done anything to my body while I was away!"

Italy/Nami hid behind his hands. "What? You mean like touch your boobs? I didn't do anything like that!"

Nami/Italy smacked him anyway. Italy/Nami fell over from shock and Nami/Italy started freaking out because she had hurt her delicate body.

"Okay, bro, what are these things?" Franky/America held up the Mentos pack. America/Franky grinned.

"That doesn't really matter. Look at this!" he took out an almost-full bottle of cola from his fridge. "Okay, put one in here!"

Franky/America shrugged and dropped in the tablet. Immediately the cola bubbled over the top, spilling down the sides and dripping onto the deck. His eyes widened.

"Whoa, that's _super_! Can I keep the rest of these things?"

"Yeah, sure, I only use them for this kind of thing anyway! Why does this thing run on cola, anyway?"

"Because cola is the _super_ drink of men!" to prove his point, he grabbed a bottle and downed the entire thing. Wiping his lips, he added "By the way, bro, your flying machine is AWESOME!"

"You flew one of my airplanes!? Which one!?"

"It said Curtiss on the side! Anyway, I took Chopper—" he gestured towards Canada/Chopper, "—for a ride on that thing until the engine started smoking. But don't worry! I fixed it up good as new!"

"You're the best, dude!" As one, they put their forearms together (or, in Franky/America's case, the back of his wrists) and yelled "SUUUUPER!"

Meanwhile, Zoro/England and Sanji/France were yelling at England/Zoro and France/Sanji, the latter of who was cuddling up to the former.

"I'm telling you, get my body off that disgusting swordsman's body!" yelled Sanji/France in frustration.

"And I'm telling you to get that shit-cook's body off of _my_ body!" yelled Zoro/England.

"Yes, _do_ get the hell off," growled England/Zoro. France/Sanji pouted and snuggled closer to England/Zoro.

"I love my _angleterre_ and refuse to let him go!"

Japan/Robin and Robin/Japan stood by and surveyed them with amusement.

England/Zoro sighed and muttered something, waving his hand. In an instant, everyone found themselves in a different body than before.

"Eh!?" exclaimed Zoro/Usopp. "What's happening?"

"This isn't my body!" yelled America/Luffy.

"Whoa, what!?" cried Usopp/France.

There was general confusion. England/Nami exclaimed "Er, sorry about that! I'll try again…"

"Okay," he said several tries later. "Raise your hand if you're not in your own body."

No one raised their hand, though America said that he felt a bit nauseous from the constant switching.

"Anyway," said England, "we have to get back home now. We have duties to take care of, such as important political business and cleaning up the mess from last night. And for me, purchasing a new television is in order – again."

Franky started crying. "You guys are great! I'm not crying, shut up!"

The nations waved goodbye to the Strawhats as they stepped inside the circle. It started glowing blue and they slowly sank into the deck.

* * *

The circle in America's house was glowing red when the nations slowly came up through the floor. When they were all the way through and off the circle, the glow faded. England went to wipe the chalk away while everyone greeted them.

"Veneziano!" said Romano. "It's you again, right? Not the crazy chick?"

"Hi, _fratello_~! It's me~! That lady was scary…" he hugged his brother while Spain hugged them both.

"You two are so cute!"

"Get the hell off!"

"Dude," America was saying to Prussia, "that was an awesome way to answer the phone! I'm gonna have to use that next time!"

"Only if you give credit to the awesome Prussia!"

"Deal!"

"Hold on…" said Korea. "England, what _did_ cause that? You said that you didn't do anything, correct?"

"Well," said England, straightening up with the wet and dirty rag, the floor clean, "I honestly have no idea. It may have been one of my _hi-lar-i-ous_ elder brothers playing a prank, it may have been Sealand again, or it may have been a bend in the space-time continuum which somehow caused two universes to collide and thus causing the swap." He shrugged. "But who knows?"

"I vote three," said America. "It sounds cooler."

"It's not a democratic matter—"

"I vote three too!" said Prussia. He and America high-fived. There was a knock on the door upstairs.

"Hold on, I'll get that…" America went to the door and opened it. "Oh, hey, dude. Yeah, he's downstairs. Come on down."

He went back downstairs with Germany behind him. Prussia jumped. "West! Hey, how's it going?"

"_Brüder_, I told you that I needed your help cleaning the house!" Germany yelled. "You're coming home now and you are going to help me with the cleaning!"

He grabbed Prussia by the ear and dragged him away with a nod to the rest of the nations.

"We should get going too," said Spain, stretching. The others nodded.

"So, what, we're not going to talk about what happened?" asked France.

"Maybe we can bring it up at the next party," said America, grinning. "Hey, you guys wanna come over next week and—"

"Dear Lord, no," said England quickly.

* * *

**That's it~! I'm sorry if any of you are dissatisfied (and I'm sure that many of you are). **

**I _think_ someone asked about the Mentos/Cola thing in a review or PM. I can't find it if they did, though, so if that was you, please let me know so I can give you credit!**

**Story's done~! Thank you for all your support, minna-sama~!**


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